Archive | November, 2009

People call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat or a prostitute.

17 Nov

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Every good nostalgic blog mentions something about their unnatural crush on a cartoon character from MTV’s Daria.  For me, like many, I was desperately in love with Trent, apathetic musician and older brother to Jane. But Daria was more than just hot cartoon characters.

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Daria and her stud, Trent

Daria was arguably the single best cartoon character ever to grace television in the late ‘90s.  She is the reason for my scholarly apathy; Because of Daria, I skipped senior prom, developed a monotone voice and I became the girl who would literally watch the volleyball roll past me in gym class (when I even bothered getting changed), hell my haircut even resembles Daria’s. I didn’t know why I hated high school or my peers, but I knew it was in the same spirit of everything I loved while growing up.  Apathy on T.V. raised my generation.

Daria premiered on MTV in 1997. Her character was first introduced in Beavis and Butthead. In 2002 the show was canceled and doomed to live in syndication on the “N” network.

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Daria on Beavis and Butthead

I have been waiting years for Daria to be released on DVD. I once met a friend of a friend whose uncle was the producer of the show, I then begged for a copy but no dice.  It was announced a few months ago in the opening preview to The State series DVD that my wait will be worth it, Daria is scheduled to be released in fall 2010.

Daria, I miss the way you pair large black boots with skirts, the way you get joy out of “Sick Sad World” and your Mark Twain bed shirt.

Daria Morgendorffer, I miss your face- Shassie

UPDATE: Daria on DVD will be out to buy on May 11, 2010!

Still learning about the complexities of friendship…

16 Nov

Do you know what T.V. is missing? The advice and snappy dialogue of an educator and elder. Not a young hip teacher like Mr. Kotter (Welcome Back Kotter), Doug Stevens (Swingtown), or even Mr. Matthews (90210). What T.V. needs is a new Mr. Feeny.

Mr. Feeny was arguably the best part of ABC’s Boy Meets World and now he has disappeared completely. William Daniels was the man behind the grey mustache.

Daniels had a stellar pre-Boy career. He has co-starred in some of the most influential pieces of pop-culture; he was Dustin Hoffman’s father in The Graduate (1967), as John Adams in 1776 (1972) and as the voice of KITT in the original Night Rider.

Good news, Daniels is still alive and ready for a Boy Meets World Reunion. Currently he has no new projects, although a KITT GPS voice is rumored.

William, I miss your large eternally present mustache, your various neutral colored sweaters and your frank lectures.

William Daniels, I miss your face.

If you’re in doubt about angels being real…

15 Nov

Gillian Zinser’s new surfer chick character on 90210, Ivy, is reminding me of better more simple times, when all a girl needed to do for attention while surfing was pretend to drown like the great pre-teen temptress Gidget.

Gidget was a character so great that in the 1950s -1960s four different actresses had to play her in film, sequel, and television. I miss them all.

Sandra Dee as Gidget

Sandra Dee, the original girl + midget (a Gidget) introduced the role to teens everywhere in 1959 when she adapted the character from Fredrick Kohner’s novel Gidget into the film of the same title. Sandra Dee’s Gidget was blonde and stick thin with a high-pitched squeaky voice. Gidget was grossed out by men and unwilling to grow up. Sandra Dee was a popular actress in many more films including the melodramatic classic that is Douglas Sirk’s remake of Imitation of Life (1959) and also in the Tammy and the FILL IN THE BLANK Franchise. Dee went on to marry Bobby Darrin at age 18. And in middle-age became an anorexic alcoholic.

Deborah Walley in Gidget Goes Hawaiian

The next girl to fill the baggy boyish bathing suits of Gidget was Deborah Walley. Walley played Gidge as a wide-eyed red head in Gidget Goes Hawaiian (1961). Post Gidget, Walley was in 15 major motion pictures, most of them B- movie Beach Flicks for American Pictures. Walley last worked on Television in 1999 in a bit part on Baywatch. Sadly Deborah Walley died in 2001 of cancer.

The fourth lucky girl was Cindy Carol in the non-related sequel to a sequel Gidget Goes to Rome (1963). Carol had the shortest post-Gidget career, appearing in her last film in 1965 in the Brigitte Bardot movie, Dear Brigitte (1965). She was also the least popular among fans, her Gidget rarely surfed and often tested the word of Moondoggie.

Sally Field as Gidget

The last, and in my opinion the most important woman, to play Gidget was the one and the only Sally Field in the T.V. series adaptation of the film. Field’s Gidget was vivacious and conniving. This Gidge got dates, tortured her older sister, helped her community, dated her teachers and met pop stars all while being the model of the perfect daughter to Conrad Bain look-a-alike Don Porter. Sally field, known to most of my generation as the mother from Mrs. Doubtfire (1993), has had the most successful post-Gidge career. She has starred in more than 4 T.V. shows including The Flying Nun (1967-1970) and the current ABC Drama Brothers and Sisters. She has been in more than 40 films including Forrest Gump (1994), Steel Magnolias (1989), Where the Heart Is (2000), and T.V. movie gem Sybil(1976).

Gidgets, I miss your silly resistance towards being feminine, the frequent amount of times you hire boys to be your dates, and your gift for green screen surfing.

Gidgets, I miss your face-Shassie

Do they wear underwear in the shower?

13 Nov

There is nothing I love more than introducing people to the Hollywood gems that they somehow missed while growing up. Today, it was Heathers (1989). As I basked in the artistic genius of Winona Ryder I realized that her once over exposed face has been missing from tabloids and from mainstream movies for years.

Sure, this could be because studios are still cautious about hiring a shoplifter to promote their work, but bitch please that was way back in 2001. The world was a different place and she was still young and impressionable. It’s hard to pay for things when you are used to getting them for free.

Winona has been in the public eye since her early teens in the late ‘80s with movies like Lucas (1986) and Edward Scissorhands (1990); typically playing angsty teens, wannabe nuns, and sexually deviant liars. For the best of Winona I suggest you witness her genius in Mermaids (1990) with Christina Ricci and the great Cher. In Mermaids, Ryder wants to be a nun in order to depress her mother, unfortunately she is Jewish and fighting a colossal infatuation for Michael Schoeffling, better known to girls as Jake Ryan of Sixteen Candles(1984).

Currently Ryder is planning a comeback. She is scheduled to star in Black Swan (2009) currently in pre-production. Lord knows A Scanner Darkly (2006) did nothing but bury her career even deeper into its grave.

Winona, I miss the way you read your diary entries out loud, how you constantly critique “the Man” and your use of the five finger discount.

Winona Ryder, I miss your face- Shassie

The Perfect Mother

11 Nov

Last night’s episode of the 90210 revival left original Bev. Hills fans in mourning; Jackie Taylor (the Rev. Ann Gillespie) has presumably lost her battle to cancer. Bless her soul.

I knew I loved Jackie the moment I saw her stumble out of her house to sit by her pool in a to-die-for gold high-wasted bikini complete with glittery fringe in the 7th episode of Beverly Hills 90210 titled, The Perfect Mother.

Yes, we all know that Jackie Taylor had her faults (exploiting her children to aid in her career, partying nightly, a cocaine addiction, 3 failed marriages, and at least 3 known drug relapses) but she was trained to be a model, not a role model. Besides, Kelly(Jennie Garth) and Erin(Jessica Stroup)  grew up okay. I didn’t see either of their fathers rushing to save them from the negligence of Jackie.

Jackie with Daughters Kelly Taylor and Erin Silver

There could be a brightside to the death of Ms. Taylor, a funeral could be reason enough for a reunion (David Silver anyone?). However with Jackie dead, the career of Ann Gillespie is beginning to look awfully grim. Since the end of the original series in 2000, she has only had 4 projects (bit parts in T.V. shows like Gilmore Girls and Judging Amy) and one of them was reprising her role as erratic Jackie Taylor on the new 90210.

 Jackie, I miss your brightly colored suits with large shoulder pads, your short blown back pixie hair, and your relentless dedication to drugs.

Jackie Taylor, I miss your face- Shassie

Cara Mia

9 Nov

David Krumholtz. Most of you may know him as Goldstein, the pot-smoking Jew from the Harold and Kumar franchise, or as Michael, Cameron’s best friend in 10 Things I Hate About You. To me, Krumholtz will always be known as Joel Glicker, sheet-white asthmatic lover to Wednesday from the Adams Family Values (1993).

Krumholtz has been working steadily since he began acting in 1993 with Life with Mikey. He has appeared in movies and shows like Slums of Beverly Hills (1998), Freaks and Geeks (1999), Undeclared (2001), The Santa Clause (1994), Ray (2004), Tenacious D. Pick of Destiny (2006), Superbad (2007), and the recent cinematic failure I Love You Man (2009). Since 2005, he has worked as the dashing detective mathematician Charlie on CBS’s Numb3rs.

As a primary member of the Judd Apatow gang you would think that Krumholtz’s future seems promising; but, aside from Numb3rs no upcoming projects are rumored. I am not prepared for a life without D.K..

David , I miss your childlike use of sarcastic schtick, your pale lanky body and your long curly eternally wet black locks.

David Krumholtz, I’m beginning to miss your face-Shassie

Picking Daisies

2 Nov

My Sunday nights have felt emptier for the past few months and VH1 is solely to blame. There is a void in my heart that can only be filled by the whining, drinking and horrific singing of the one and the only Daisy De La Hoya.

Daisy De La Hoya, niece of boxer Oscar De La Hoya, first appeared on VH1 trying to seduce Bret Michaels, of the hair band Poison, on Rock of Love season 2. If you didn’t know, Daisy’s heart was genuinely broken by Bret and she used the reunion to go ballistic on Heather when her feelings were doubted. Thankfully, VH1 gave Daisy the opportunity to find true love again in her own kick ass reality show spin off, Daisy of Love.

Daisy of Love gave De La Hoya the opportunity to showcase her rock ‘n’ roll talents while watching her oddly dubbed beauxs (12 Pack, Flex, Sinister, Chi Chi, Weasel and London to name a few) perform extraordinary tasks like running a Daisy mannequin across a paintball field to safety and re-writing nursery rhymes into crude rap songs.

Currently Daisy is working on her music career, which, as far as I can tell, is going to be stellar. I missed Daisy so much that this year for Halloween I decided to honor the queen of reality T.V. by dressing up in her likeness.

Me and A.L. as Daisy and Bret.

Daisy, I miss your glistening mammoth lips, your gratuitous amount of layering, and your “all around badass-ness”.

Daisy De La Hoya, I miss your face- Shassie

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